This is the official documentation of a girl who HAD Stage III Hodgkin's Lymphoma, and who is enjoying life despite the unfortunate circumstances she finds herself in. She is learning a lot about life, her Heavenly Father, and herself. This is her story.
Woah, woah, woah. These last few weeks have been absolutely crazy. I have been working on projects like nobody's business. Imagine this... two all nighters in one week in addition to three projects and other regular homework added on top of it. I don't hide my emotions very well so it must have been quite a scene to see me rushing around the library frantic style like a mad woman. Might I add a proud bragging moment here. I only had a quarter of a melt down and continued on with all my projects. But all my frantic work and hiding out in my room to complete all said projects has paid off. I am proud to say that I am kicking royal behind at school. I know that I wouldn't have been able to get through any of it without the help of my Heavenly Father, family and friends. I am very blessed to be able to rely on them for anything.
Studying like the awesome smarty pants that I am.
Remember how I said that I only wear a dress to school once in a blue moon? Well once upon a time I decided that I should actually dress up for devotional. Everything went great through the day and I even felt like it wasn't too bad to dress up for Tuesday's occasionally. Until I was walking home and I fell in the snow. Let me tell ya, falling in snow is not fun at all and falling in a dress is even more cold and humiliating. So therefore I shall refrain from wearing dresses to school unless specifically required to. Which might happen more because of my major. But that's okay, but no more dressing up for pleasure. Or else I shall probably have death by snowflakes once more.
I looked great, but do not be deceived. That dress betrayed me.
Even though I had a few crazy weeks and fell in the snow a few times, I have had a huge overwhelming feeling of how much I am loved by my Heavenly Father and how aware He is of me at all times. I have been so blessed this semester and am very excited to continue on and to learn newer and greater things.
Knowing that I have a kind loving Heavenly Father.
Having a fellow dork to laugh with.
Going to the temple.
Having a desire for school and doing well in classes.
Cleaning. Tender Mercies. Confirmation and encouragement for my career aspirations. Being Healthy.
Harry Potter. That J.K. is a genius.
Laughing so hard that your stomach hurts for minutes,hoursdays.
Giving service. Downtown Abbey.
Not being counted as a member of the short hair clan.
Talking to a loved one.
People Watching.
Having so many blessings you can't even count or describe them all.
I have so much joy in my life. I really cannot begin to count all the reasons or to express my gratitude. I am more and more aware each day of how lucky I am. Lucky for my life. Lucky for my circumstances. Lucky to have joy.
Wednesday was one of the most stressful, yet most rewarding and productive days I have had this semester. Apparently I was showing many signs of a mania to all around me as people were staring at me rushing around the library and campus all morning due to all the things not going quite right. In a dress mind you! I only wear dresses to school once in a blue moon so this was a rare and blessed occasion. I think I was probably a good candidate for the "One Crazy Lady" award to the People Watchers Association. I'll have to look into that.
Blue Moon Proof!
Pay no attention to the large hand shadow.
It is just deceiving as my hands are not that big.
But tricks on those people watchers! I had a secret weapon in my arsenal or else I would have been a lot worse. What is this secret weapon you may ask? Well I shall tell you.
Fervent prayer and blind faith.
This my dear friends is probably one of the greatest tools you can have in the crazy situations life can throw at you as well as the calm days. This is a lesson that I am learning more and more. When I do all that I can do and put effort into something I would like to happen, the thing I need to do is to give myself to the Lord and allow him to take over. When I give myself to the Lord everything turns out much better than when I would have done. He is an expert in every microscopic detail of my life and I need to not be so scared to have faith and take a step forward. No matter what that step may be, He will be there to provide a way to accomplish my goals and move forward.
Thank You Pinterest
"Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths."
Proverbs 3:5-6
Like I said, the other day was very hectic but oh so productive. I felt such a wonderful peace all day when I could have felt stress and annoyance. Because I made an extra effort to have the Spirit with me, I was able to be blessed with multiple tender mercies, and opportunities.
Yes, I know Heavenly Father loves meeee.
Heavenly Father loves me so much and wants me to be happy. As I rely on Him and stop being so scared of minor details and the "what ifs'" of life, I will be able to become the person I want to be and who God wants me to be as well. I am continually grateful for the lessons and opportunities that God places before me to become the best I can be.
As a college student, I am very busy so my schedule is pretty hectic. Class, homework, church, social life and little things in between, then do it all again the next day. Sleep often gets left out. I find myself getting super anxious and burned out from trying to do so much. I neglect to take care of myself in more ways than one. Why in the world did the idea come that being busy is best? I know it is good to be productive, but I need to get it out of my head that that is what is valuable in the long run. I need to find the balance and take time to slow down. But I don't need to tell you that, my dear friend Elder Uchtdorf tells it much better than I.
Isn't this Mormon Message incredible?! It is one of my favorites.
More and more I am coming the realization that I need to take time to slow down. I need to take time to just sit and meditate. At first I thought of meditation as a "hummmmmm dilly dum hummmmmmm" stuff you see in the movies with Indians floating with their legs crossed and fingers out being all Gandhi like. But the more I have thought about it there are actually a lot of benefits to it as well.
Rachel's List of Meditation Benefits:
My dear friend Gandhi-face
1. I can take time for myself and unwind.
2. Take away the pressures and overstimulation that comes throughout the day.
3. Be able to think clearly without the buzz and commotion of life.
4. I can come closer to God.
5. Become a problem solving genius.
6. Become more peaceful.
7. I get to say "hummmmmm dilly dum hummmmmmm" without feeling silly.
8. It is optimal nap opportunity if I feel so inclined.
*I'm pretty sure there are many more benefits but I haven't meditated about them fully yet.
"Meditation is the language of the soul. Meditation is a form of prayer... Meditation is one of the most secret, most sacred doors through which we pass into the presence of the Lord."
-President David O. McKay
So in order to become closer to God and to figure out my life I need to take a moment and just stop. It is okay to be still and to take time for me. I need to take care of myself spiritually, mentally and physically. Even if it sounds weird to meditate, I feel as though it is working. Taking time for me is okay and it will help me in my every day life.
So a hummmmmm dilly dum hummmmmmm to all and to all a good night!
Half turbans help in the meditation process. They allow extra inspiration.
I was going to do a full turban, but it made me feel like I was back in my bald days so I decided against that.
PS: Observe how long the locks of love are getting! Woot woot, ten points to Ravenclaw!
